Weekly Horoscopes From Professor Trelawney

Editor’s note: This article was initially published in The Daily Gazette, Swarthmore’s online, daily newspaper founded in Fall 1996. As of Fall 2018, the DG has merged with The Phoenix. See the about page to read more about the DG.

*Disclaimer: No tea leaves were harmed in the formulation of these horoscopes. 

Mar 21-Apr 19
Happy Birthday, Aries! Solar energies will help you see many opportunities to expand your relationships and make new plans. Maybe you’ll make a surprising new friend, have an awesome birthday dinner, or decide to take an unusual class next semester.

Famous Aries:

  • Akira Kurosawa
  • Bessie Smith
  • Rachel Maddow
  • Colin Powell

Apr 20-May 20
With Venus affecting your sign, you seek stability and security in your relationships with others, Taurus. As much as you want to spend time with your friends, remember to take time to focus on career and academic responsibilities.

May 21-Jun 20
You have several uneasy situations at play in your life, Gemini. If you want to make things easier, you need to be honest and open about how you feel. Spend some time early this week figuring out your desires.

Jun 21-Jul 22
You may find yourself focusing on the details of those around you, and over-analyzing various aspects of your life. Don’t get too nitpick-y this week, Cancer. Looking at the big picture will make situations seem more positive.

Jul 23-Aug 22
When your loved ones struggle, Leo, your cheerful nature kicks in. Though your initial urge might be to fight the tears with laughter, it might be more helpful to just listen and take their issues seriously.

Aug 23-Sep 22
Instead of trying to hurry things along in your love life, take time to assess what you really want in a relationship. You may have your eye on someone special, but now is a good time to explore your options and play the field.

Sep 23-Oct 22
It’s hard for you to feel at ease when there seems to be nothing to counterbalance the workload from your classes. If you feel anxious or depressed, a walk in the Crum will help you be mindful of the positive things in your life.

Oct 23-Nov 21
Early this week, cosmic events might lead to feelings of doubt, insecurity, and anger. Make sure to spend time thinking positively about your personal and spiritual goals, Scorpio, and be ready to make changes in your life.

Nov 22-Dec 21
You may feel as if you give a lot of support to your family, and all they give you in return is stress. As much as you might want to directly confront the issue, don’t be afraid to give yourself some time to cool down before you speak about it.

Dec 22-Jan 19
Though you may consider some bold moves this week, you should be cautious about changing your routine too drastically. Stability will be important to you, especially because of the academic challenges ahead.

Jan 20-Feb 18
You’ve almost made it, Aquarius! Just a few more weeks and you’ll be done with the semester. Until then, lunar influences will help you keep up your morale during this week’s hectic schedule.

Feb 19-Mar 20
As much as you care for your friends, it’s also important to care for yourself. Even if it means confronting a loved one, both of you will feel better if you communicate your needs and address the issues that bother you.

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