Editor’s note: This article was initially published in The Daily Gazette, Swarthmore’s online, daily newspaper founded in Fall 1996. As of Fall 2018, the DG has merged with The Phoenix. See the about page to read more about the DG.
With the housing lotteries coming up soon, the Gazette decided to sit down with the Swatties who know their dorms best, the Dorm Creatures! This week, we interview Willets Cat, the favored feline of the campus’ well-known basically-sophomore dorm.
Daily Gazette: So, what’s your favorite thing about living in and/or around Willets?
Willets Cat: I’d have to say location. It’s right by McCage, a short saunter away from Sharples, right near Worth Health Center. Plus, it has that weird seasonal candy cane you can conveniently scratch yourself against if you want to.
DG: What do you hate about living in and/or around Willets?
WC: The residents’ taste in music. Sometimes, I’m just trying to get my cat nap on, and this God-awful ska or death metal is just blaring. Awful! The walls are pretty thin, so you can hear everything (and I mean everything, you hypersexual college students) going on in the next few rooms.
DG: What do you have to say about this semester’s Mouse Invasion?
WC: Uggh, don’t get me started! mockingly Oh, Willets Cat, why haven’t you done anything about the mice? Aren’t you supposed to be, like, a descendant of the lion, King of the Jungle, predator of all things? Puh-lease. Don’t be so carnivonormative! I’m a Level 5 vegan. Felines can have morals and standards too, you know? This campus is not as progressive as everyone thinks it is. Shut your (mouse) trap, and seal it in an air-tight container.
DG: Last words?
WC: Don’t spay or neuter your pets.
An excerpt from next week’s Better Know a Dorm Creature! with Dana Bug.
DG: Why Dana, rather than Hallowell?
DB: Um, substance-free, please! And, everyone knows Dana has the best hall life on campus. The angle of the building is also quite different. At sunrise, it catches the light juuust right. I’m very sensitive to that type of thing.
