Swarthmore is known for its academics and its perfectionist students. Swarthmore is also known for its lameness and lack of fun. But I argue that Swarthmore is only known for the latter two traits because its students are lazy in hosting events. Sure, we don’t party five out of seven days a week. Sure, we don’t have a D1 football team and tailgates every weekend in the fall. Sure, we are in the libraries and pulling all-nighters way too often. But that doesn’t mean we don’t have fun.
Students will always complain that we have no fun here, that things are too strict, and that Swarthmore is where fun goes to die. But that doesn’t have to be the case. We have all seen the classic duck-in, duck-out strategy a lot of us employ here: We’ll duck our heads into Olde Club or Paces, see that it’s empty, and then leave and come back later. But if people were willing to stay, willing to get the party started, maybe we would have some more fun.
There’s also the classic line of “PubSafe is too strict, PubSafe ruins things.” They really don’t ruin things if you do it the right way. If you host a party, follow the rules, and be smart, you’ll see things go well. Take it from me, who hosted an Alcohol Registered Event (ARE) with no hiccups or complications. It is simply the laziness of not wanting to follow the rules and not wanting to be responsible for a night that makes it harder and harder to wash the stain of lameness from Swarthmore’s reputation.
If people are constantly going to complain about Swarthmore being lame, then do something about it! You can’t expect things to get better just because you continue to complain about how lame it is. But the fundamental issue here is that people do not want to host a party and take on that responsibility. Yes, there is the fear of getting in trouble, but again, if you do things the right way, that worry quickly dissolves.
For as academically inclined and intelligent as Swatties are, we are also really good at being lazy. And yes, parties are not for everyone. But for those who want parties, you have to host them. You have to stay at Olde Club when there may be only a few people there. If you want things to be fun, you have to make them fun!!! And doing so doesn’t require as much effort as your academics at Swarthmore. It simply involves being smart, being responsible, and hosting a party. For one night. And Swatties are too lazy to do that.
Of course, this does not apply to all Swatties. People do host parties, and to those who do, I applaud you. I am glad that not all hope is lost. But it cannot be on just these few people to host parties every weekend.
Beyond parties, if you want to have fun traditions or bring things back, put in the work! Make things happen! Simply complaining about things will not make anything better. If anything, it makes things worse by building resentment. So do something about it! Make Swarthmore the place you want it to be, whether it’s bringing back traditions or throwing parties. Us Swatties are smart. We can’t complain and expect everything to fix itself. Stop being lazy.
