Martin Warner

Editor’s note: This article was initially published in The Daily Gazette, Swarthmore’s online, daily newspaper founded in Fall 1996. As of Fall 2018, the DG has merged with The Phoenix. See the about page to read more about the DG.

Have you ever wondered why we have missed connections on a campus of 1,400 students? It’s not exactly hard to find people if you really want to, right? It seems to me that Missed Connections is less like a useful tool for rendezvous and more like a cesspool of anonymously vented sexual frustrations. Yum.

Let’s face it: Swarthmore is a haven for the timid. And it doesn’t stop with sex stuff.

Isn’t there a burning question or two that you’ve always had for a professor, student, or staff member, but were too afraid to ask?

Wouldn’t it be great if some brave person (who is not you) could ask that very question? No matter if these questions are off the wall or on the nose, important or impertinent, pressing or pointless. I’ll ask them. Whatevs.

And so I introduce to you, dear readers, a new segment called 5 Things You’ve Always Wanted to Know About…

We’re starting off with 5 Things You’ve Always Wanted to Know About Martin Warner.

If you’ve got a question you’ve always wanted to ask registrar extraordinaire Martin Warner, post it in the comments right here, one question per comment. Use the arrows to up-vote or down-vote your most/least favorite, and I’ll ask the best of them. Or if you’re too shy to even post them in the comments, feel free to send them along to instead.

Ask away, anonymous populous of Swarthmore College!

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