Wednesday, April 3, 2002

by Chiara Ricciardone
Gazette News Reporter

In this technology-dominated era, computers are an integral part of most
people’s everyday lives, making them the perfect medium for large-scale
April Fool’s pranks. This year, one major hoax utilized the
reserve-student email list to prank the entire student body, while another
targeted students who print from iMacs.

On Monday morning, Swarthmore students saw an email with the subject line
“All You’re Grades Are Belong to Us!” in their inboxes. The prankster,

who signed himself “The Professor”, claimed to have hacked into student

records and promised to distribute the information the following day. A
series of conflicting emails, apparently from high-level administrators,
followed throughout the day.

The first one, supposedly from Dean of the College Bob Gross, assured
students that all records were secure and condemned the prankster. One
hour later, a message apparently sent by Registrar Martin Warner warned
that the system had indeed been breached, and that “student information

including academic and financial records [might] have been
compromised.” Later in the day, a third fraudulent email signed by
Associate Dean Ted Goundie claimed that all previous messages from
administrators were part of the prank. In closing, it stated, “Student

records are, and always have been, safe.” There was also a fourth,
obviously false, message from Bob Gross that contained profanity.

While some technologically savvy students could detect from the headers
that none of the emails were legit, Warner realized as he walked around
during lunch that “there was enough doubt to warrant a response.”
In the
late afternoon, he sent out a response reassuring students that the
reserved-student emails were pranks, signing it with his traditional and
distinctive ‘Regards, Martin.’ He dismissed the hoax as “a little funny,

mostly harmless, and no big deal.” Robin Jacobsen, Client Services Manager

for Information Technology Services (ITS), notes that making emails appear
to be from administrators is “fairly easy to do” and that this kind
of
practical joke has happened before.

More annoying and disruptive to Jacobsen and the ITS staff was the program

that replaced particular words with blank spaces in documents printed from
iMacs. The list of affected words included ‘SCCS’, ‘computer’, ‘source’,
‘capitalism’, ‘Plato’, ‘philosophy’, ‘postmodernism’, and
‘Afghanistan.’ All morning and afternoon, ITS simultaneously directed
confused students to PCs, answered their questions, gathered information,
and tried to find the source of the problem. “What was done to the server

we just don’t know,” admitted Jacobsen in an informational email. After

trying various different approaches, the problem disappeared on its own
around 3:00 p.m. “Students were frustrated, and we were frustrated,”

Jacobsen said. However, like past April Fool’s Pranks that have plagued
ITS, she believes that, “In hindsight, it will seem clever.”

*****

* Israel’s military operation in the West Bank, designed to round up
Palestinian militants and arms, continued yesterday with tanks entering two
Palestinian towns – home to several of the suicide bombers who have attacked
Israel in recent months. Meanwhile, some 120 Palestinian gunmen are holed
up in the Church of the Nativity, the Bethlehem church where Jesus is
believed to have been born, after being surrounded by Israeli troops. Also
on Tuesday, the Israelis offered to allow Palestinian leader Yasser Arafat
to leave his compound in Ramalla on the condition that he go into exile.
Arafat refused the offer, saying he would rather be a “martyr” than
leave
his people.

* President Bush reaffirmed his support for a Palestinian state yesterday
and called for normal relations between Israel and its neighbors. Bush also
toned down his criticism of Yasser Arafat, who he has chastized frequently
during the recent escalation of violence between Palestinians and Israelis.
The President has been under much heat from European allies and Arab states
to take a more effective stance in the Middle East.

* Bush’s domestic agenda was busy on Tuesday as well, with the President
unveiling a new education initiative that will provide support for the
nation’s young children. His plans include an overhaul of Head Start that
will seek more accountability for the low-income preschool program.
Additionally, he pledged to offer advanced training to 50,000 Head Start
teachers and begin a $45 million research project into early childhood
literacy. Congressional Democrats applauded the tenor of Bush’s message but
called for increased funding for early child-care education.

*****

Passover
Bond Memorial Hall, 5:30 p.m.

MST3K Showing
Trotter 203, 7:00 p.m.

Women Make Movies Pre-Celebration Film Screening
Intercultural Center, 7:00 p.m.

College Democrats meeting
Parrish Parlor East, 8:00 p.m.

Film Society film screening
Kirby Lecture Hall, 10:00 p.m.

———-
Cycling Club Presents Spring Bike Clean-Up
Has the ride up the hill to class been a bit difficult
lately? Bring your bike by the Field House parking lot from 10am-1pm this
Saturday, April 6th and get it fixed up. The Swarthmore Cycling Club will be
on hand to
perform basic repairs and cleaning. If more elaborate repairs are
necessary, transportation will be provided to the local bike shop for you
and your bike. Services are free of charge and open to all. Spring is
upon us! Is your bike ready?

*****

SPORTS UPDATE

In their home opener yesterday afternoon, the softball team dropped a
double-header against Ursinus, 8-0 and 7-2. In the first game, the Garnet
were held to just two hits, singles by Sam Brody ’05 and Pam Lavallee ’03.
Maryann Chambers ’04 pitched five innings, giving up nine hits and eight
runs, only one of which was earned.

In the night cap, Mary Mintel ’05 went 2 for 3 with a run scored. Freshman

pitcher Val Marone took the loss, going six innings and giving up seven
hits and seven runs, one earned. The team’s record now stands at 0-12
overall, 0-4 in the Conference.

The baseball team also fell in their contest at Ursinus, 9-5. Individual
stats were not available at time of publication. The Garnet are now 2-11-1
on the season.

*****

Despite leading 5-1 early in the game, the women’s lacrosse team lost to
Washington College yesterday, 12-9, in Centennial Conference action. Katie
Tarr ’02 led the way with four goals, bringing her career total to 214,
just four shy of the Centennial Conference all-time career record. Mavis
Biss ’02 added two goals, and Justene Hill ’04, Liz Brainard ’03, and Kim
Cariello ’02 had one apiece. The Garnet’s record falls to 2-3 overall, 0-3
in the Conference.

*****

* Barry Bonds hit two home runs and drove in five runs as the San Francisco

Giants opened their season with a 9-2 win over the Los Angeles Dodgers.
David Bell also homered for the Giants in his first game with San Francisco

since coming over from Seattle in the off-season. Livan Hernandez earned
the win, scattering two runs and four hits over eight innings. Kevin Brown
was the loser, surrendering seven runs and nine hits in just four innings.
Bonds’ 569 career home runs place him seventh behind Harmon Killebrew on
the all-time career list.

* Despite the return of second-leading scorer Jeremy Roenick after seven
games missed due to a torn right ACL, the Philadelphia Flyers fell to the
Boston Bruins last night, 4-2. Adam Oates and Keith Primeau both scored in
the opening eight minutes of play, but the Flyers were shut out for the
rest of the game by Boston goaltender Byron Dafoe. Bill Guerin and Brian
Rolston contributed the go-ahead and insurance goal, bringing the Bruins’
road winning streak to seven and giving Boston a four-point lead over
Philadelphia, which has lost four straight games, for first place in the
Eastern Conference.

* Mike Tyson will be registered as a convicted sex offender in Tennessee
and Mississippi, according to those state’s laws, when he fights Lennox
Lewis in Memphis. In 1992, Tyson was convicted of rape in Indiana and
sentenced to 10 years, only three of which were served. Registration with
local law enforcement is required if the offender will be in Tennessee for
10 days or more, or in Mississippi for 14 days or more. Tyson has not yet
decided whether he will stay in Memphis or in a hotel in nearby Tunica
County, Miss., before his scheduled fight. He is also registered as a sex
offender in Nevada.

*****

Today:
There are no contests scheduled for today.

Tomorrow:
Softball hosts Widener, 4:00 p.m.
Women’s lacrosse hosts Widener, 4:00 p.m.

*****

QUOTE OF THE DAY

“Man is the only animal that can remain on friendly terms with the victems

he intends to eat until he eats them.”
–Samuel Butler

*****
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