BY TIMOTHY BERNSTEIN

In print | Published April 29, 2010

My dad always hated loud noises of any kind. He didn’t discriminate. Forks hitting plates too aggressively, thunder overhead, the arrival of subway cars … He liked things at a low volume. This ruled out loud music, or at least I thought it did. Then I found out that, one birthday, he had gotten a couple of Rolling Stones tickets for my mom and him. A rock concert? I couldn’t believe it, but he had an explanation ready. There’s always something to be said, he told me, about having been able to see the best.

“Our society appreciates the best.” You can thank me later for that incredible insight. Sports are no different; in fact, that’s almost the whole point. Who has the most talent? Who takes control when he needs to? Who rises to the occasion time after time? Who would you brag about to your kids and their kids that you saw in their prime? Certain sports lend themselves to this better; Albert Pujols is the greatest baseball player alive, but you would be more likely to see him go 1 for 3 with a single than hit a tape-measure home run on any given day.

The same is true with certain positions; if you’re not watching Lawrence Taylor, chances are you aren’t telling your kids a story about watching a defensive football player (“Gather ’round everyone, so I can tell you about the day cornerback Charles Woodson neutralized the Philadelphia passing game and held the Eagles to just 134 yards in the air!”). Unfortunately, prominence and a place on the national and world stages also play a role, and that means that male athletes will get a disproportionate share of praise and recognition. All that said, five names jump out at me. None of them are controversial, and none of them are short on praise. But to take my dad’s point one step further, there’s something to be said for appreciating the best while they’re still around.

*Roger Federer *— It’s hard to truly appreciate Peyton Manning if you aren’t a football fan. The ability to differentiate blitz packages doesn’t exactly provoke visceral delight. The same goes for Tiger Woods; if you’re not into golf, he’s just a guy who banged a bunch of waitresses and made a few more putts than everybody else. On the other hand, watching Federer at his best and recognizing his greatness is not a luxury afforded only to experts. You do not have to be John McEnroe to appreciate how Federer, on the run, facing break point and with only a sliver of daylight through which to aim the ball, can hit a passing forehand winner — then do it six more times in that same set. Of course, the nature of the sport has a lot to do with this; while there are subtle levels of tennis greatness, they will inevitably come out for everyone to see. Federer has elevated his place in the sport that the debate over whether or not he is the greatest to ever play the game has subsided in favor of the debate over what hagiographic phrase should be attributed to him next. He’s 28 now, so clichés like “poetry in motion” and talk of how he “nearly floats above the court” have been given their due by now. My personal favorite, for its slightly blunt nature and pitch-perfect summation, is “tennis porn.” Really, that’s EXACTLY what it is; tennis that’s so good that it’s instinctively pleasing to watch. The term also helpfully separates him from the other great player of his era; Rafael Nadal, for all of his incredible skill, does not have a “tennis porn” style of play (closer to an actual porn style of play, if we’re being honest). Does the hyperbole become irritating? Sure it does, but that shouldn’t obscure the fact that it’s all deserved. He is one of a kind, after all, so what would the point be in holding back?

LeBron James — The debate, for all intents and purposes, has reached its conclusion. In 2010, LeBron is now better than Kobe, and nothing that happens in the playoffs can change that. Maybe the Lakers will win another title, but the chance of that happening on Kobe Bryant’s shoulders alone no longer exists. Maybe Cleveland will fall short again, but would it ever be because of, and not in spite of, LeBron James? When L.A. won last year, all anybody wrote about was how Kobe finally could get credit for being the one to carry his team to the title, a charge which ignored the immensely talented roster backing him up. Is there really any part of Cleveland’s success over the past five years that isn’t thanks to Number 23? Because of this, LeBron is able to exist more as an entity than any other basketball player in the NBA today. From day one, he was the undisputed center of his universe. Unlike Bryant, there was never a period in which he was forced to share the credit for victory. Everything — absolutely everything — has fallen on him, even going back into high school. Whether or not he embraces the responsibility, we can’t know for sure. But he’s The King, and leaving Cleveland, if that’s what should happen, won’t change that at all.

*Peyton Manning *— In-Game Anecdote that Reaffirms Manning’s Greatness #4572: 2009 AFC Championship Game, second quarter, Jets leading Colts 17-6, 2:11 remaining, Jets surging with confidence, Colts take over on their own 20. This, by any logical narrative of a football game, was by no means the crucial moment in the game. By the illogical narrative of playing against Peyton Manning, this drive meant everything. Stop him from conducting one of his specialty two-minute exhibitions of perfection, and you just might have a chance. Let him score, and you might as well not even come on the field for the second half. The gracious Jets gave Manning two minutes and 11 seconds. Manning only needed 58. Three perfect passes to Austin Collie (the latest in a long line of good receivers Manning has made great) later, the score was 17-13 Jets. It may as well have been 63-0 Colts for all the possibility that New York was going to win that game. As it turns out, they didn’t even score another point. Knowing he had to take control to avert disaster, Manning had pulled out the rug from under yet another opponent. It didn’t even take a minute.

*Michael Phelps *— With almost no exceptions, an Olympian gets one chance to prove himself. One chance for the Games to sync up with that single moment after he has overcome the growing pains of maturation and before he loses the step that separated him from everybody else. What an Olympian does in that one moment is what will define him forever. Phelps’ performance in the 2008 Games might be the best example contemporary sports history offers of how an athlete seized his moment and wrung it for every inch of its worth because he knew that by the time the next Olympics rolled around, he would be 27 and someone else would likely have caught up by then. Under those circumstances, to publicly declare a goal of winning a gold medal in all eight of your events — and then get it done? For reference, imagine telling LeBron James that he had one chance to win a title. Or telling Tiger Woods that he would play in one Masters in his life, and that he had to play flawlessly to win it. Would they rise to the occasion? It’s hard to say. In Phelps’ case, we’ve already learned the answer.

*Tiger Woods *— Because he was bred to be the greatest and actually followed through on that. Because he set the record at the most famous course in the world when he was 21. Because he once won a major championship on one knee. Because we now have the “Tiger Slam.” Because “Tiger Woods Greatest Shots” returns 1300 hits on YouTube. Because before last Thanksgiving, he was a golfer who made himself into the single most famous athlete in the world. Because he’s Tiger Woods, for God’s sake, and of course you’d tell your grandchildren if you saw him play, since he’s the guy they based the Tiger Woods PGA Tour video games on, and that’s all there is to it.

Timothy is a first-year. You can reach him at tbernst1@swarthmore.edu.

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