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April 01, 2010

Board of Managers Approves Zombie Deer Cull

This weekend, the Board of Managers approved a controversial plan to cull the zombified deer currently proliferating in the Crum Woods. It is still unknown why the deer, which were thought to have been vanquished successfully this past winter, have risen again
April 1, 2010

Dana Bans Pizzas in Bid to Be the Healthier Danawell Dorm

After the Housing Committee banned smoking in Hallowell, the Dana RAs and interested residents convened an emergency meeting and debated about unhealthy options to ban in Dana. One Dana RA explained, "Dana has always had a pristine reputation and is always looking
April 1, 2010

Sharples Introduces “Airplain” Bar

A whiff of change is in the air in Sharples this year. Aside from changing the name of “Patio Bar,” the ski-lodge-turned-dining hall also introduced an innovative new bar: "Airplain" Snacks.
April 1, 2010

Swarthmore Admits Five Na’vi for Class of 2014

For next year's incoming class, Swatties may be confused seeing several Na'vi students walking around. However, Swatties should have no fear. The Na'vi are not here to fight; rather, they are just as eager and passionate as other Swatties in getting a
April 1, 2010

The Truth About The Truth

As many of you will no doubt remember, there was some controversy in the comments section of my last column about whether my column title, "The Truth" was meant ironically or not. Here's the answer.
April 1, 2010

Garnet Quidditch Brings Home Regional Cup

Last night, Swarthmore's newest athletic team took home one final win to close out its regular season. The Garnet's Quidditch squad stole the regional championship game from right underneath the noses of their rivals, the Hungry Hungry Hippogriffs of Middlebury College, earning
April 1, 2010

Dean Leaves for North Korea

After Dean Sams and Wilcox announced last semester they were leaving for NYU Abu Dhabi, one more administrator announced their departure. Dean of Internal Human Rights Liz Smithy is headed to North Korea to establish the country's first liberal arts college.
April 1, 2010

The Zombie Invasion of 1881

It’s not uncommon for Swarthmore students today to make plans for a hypothetical zombie apocalypse. Yet it’s a little-known secret of Swarthmore history that once upon a time, Swarthmore students were actually forced to make these decisions.
April 1, 2010
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