BY LEAH RETHY

In print | Published January 31, 2008

In Swarthmore there is little opportunity for fine dining. Luckily, though, we do have quite an assortment of places from which we can order pizza. The prime spots for ordering are Renato’s, Alfredo’s, Appetito’s and Acapulco, and there is a very definite hierarchy regarding the quality of the various restaurants.

Renato’s: The most popular place to order pizza. Unfortunately, though, it is only open until midnight, which is usually precisely the time pizza cravings begin. There have been a few periods around exam time when I have actually planned in advance for the relatively early closing time by making a few phone calls around 11:30 p.m. to the usual suspects to find someone who will share the Student Special. Although there is something very natural about calling in and simply saying “Student Special,” I have been told (though, I personally have never been able to order anything other than the Student Special) that they do in fact have a good variety of toppings. It is also the case that, if you have time, taking the five-minute walk into town rewards you with a warmer, and for some reason, considerably better pizza. The staff at Renato’s is quite friendly and the scene in the restaurant never fails to make me incredibly happy that I am no longer in junior high school. When I asked Pete, a four-year employee of Renato’s what he thinks of Swarthmore students, he said: “Swarthmore students are very nice…they’re good kids, not rowdy like the locals.”

Alfredo’s: After Renato’s closes, Alfredo’s is generally thought of as the best choice, assuming that it is before 1 a.m. Alfredo’s is unfortunately somewhat more expensive than the other popular pizza parlors, perhaps owing to the fact that its official name includes the term ristorante (Alfredo Ristorante, Inc.). Yet, according to some students, it truly is significantly better — especially in the cheese department. Alfredo’s also lays claim to being one of the friendlier restaurants. When I called to ask them what they thought of Swarthmore students, they were exceptionally pleasant and refrained from hanging up on a caller who was not in fact buying any pizza. Megan, the Alfredo’s employee with whom I spoke, described Swarthmore students as “generally very nice,” though she was quick to add “they order some weird stuff sometimes, like Hawaiian pizza.” Although I can sympathize with her bewilderment at the concept of a pizza that has both ham and pineapple, I fail to see the absurdity of ordering an item off the menu.

Appetito’s: I am pretty certain that I have never heard of Appetito’s being called if it is not between the hours of 12 a.m. and 1 a.m. and Alfredo’s is not picking up the phone. The prices are cheap but the pizzas are very small. Dan Symmonds ‘11 vocalizes the universal frustration felt after ordering a large pizza with a few friends only to discover that the pizza is not even big enough to satisfy your own hunger pangs: "Fuck Appitito’s for marketing a large pizza in a small box." In addition to Appetito’s selling very small pizzas, the staff is never particularly friendly. When I called them to ask if they had any comments about selling pizza to Swarthmore students, an irresistible PR opportunity, the employee simply hung up.

Acapulco: Oh dear, what is there to say about Acapulco Pizza? Although ordering from Appetito’s marks some degree of desperation, true desperation has not hit until you dial Acapulco. The pizza bears a strong resemblance to “heat-it-up-yourself” pizzas and, as Anagha Krishnan ‘10 relates, it is hard to believe that there is any actual pizza making at this pizza parlor: "I’m pretty sure Acapulco’s is just some guy’s basement, and Acapulco is a 40 year old man who buys frozen pizzas at the supermarket and heats them up in a microwave oven."

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