BY TARIQ FISCHER

In print | Published March 31, 2005

The search is over.

The women’s basketball team has a new coach. Athletic Director Adam Hertz announced yesterday that the search for Adrienne Shibles’ replacement ended sooner than he expected when a high-profile coach expressed interest in the job.

Current Texas Tech coach Bobby Knight spoke with Phoenix reporters immediately after Hertz’s announcement and expressed excitement about the opening. “When Shibles said she was leaving, I knew that this was my one chance to fulfill my dream of coaching Division III women’s basketball.” Knight said that frustration at Texas Tech’s Sweet 16 finish this season in the NCAA tournament contributed to his decision. “The players did not fulfill their responsibilities,” Knight said. “They played like a bunch of [expletive] cripples — I want to work with players who are ready to perform.”

Hertz shared Knight’s excitement. “We feel that Bobby’s coaching philosophy fits extremely well here at Swarthmore,” he said. “He brings instant legitimacy to our program.” Knight has led teams to three NCAA championships, one NIT title, one Pan-American gold medal and one Olympic gold medal.

Even so, Knight has big shoes to fill. “Coach Shibles is the best coach that I have ever played for,” forward Radiance Walters ’06 said. In her last season at Swarthmore, Shibles led the Garnet to the Centennial Conference tournament and a fourth-place finish.

Despite Knight’s credibility, some returning players are concerned about the Athletic Department’s selection. Knight was forced out of his position at Indiana University after choking Neil Reed, an IU player, at a practice. “What a pansy,” Knight said, reflecting on the incident. “A little choking never killed anybody. Jesus.”

“Holy shit,” guard Erica Lukoski ’08 said. “Maybe I should focus on tennis.” Guard Laura Popovics ’08 was eager, however, to work with Knight. “I will crush his soul and then the team will be mine,” Popovics said.

Although Knight was prepared to take a pay cut to come to Swarthmore, the administration gladly offered a rich contract to the coach. “The athletics department didn’t have the funds to pay Bobby what he deserved,” Hertz said. “Al Bloom was very good about getting us what we needed.” Bloom recognized the value of what Knight will bring to campus. “We had to renege on our living wage commitment in order to balance the budget, but coach Knight is worth every penny,” Bloom said.

When asked about IU President Miles Brand, who was burned in effigy on his own lawn by students — causing $30,000 in damage — after firing Knight in 2000, Bloom appeared unconcerned. “Coach Knight is going to be a valuable addition to the Swarthmore community. And besides, a little effigy-burning never killed anybody. Jesus.”

With the position filled, Hertz can focus on finding the women’s soccer team a new coach in the wake of Amy Brunner’s departure. “[British soccer player] David Beckham has filed his résumé with us,” Hertz said. Captain of England’s national team, Becks is seriously considering hanging up his boots in order to roam the sidelines at Clothier field. “I love American girls — and they can’t resist my British accent,” Beckham said in a telephone interview last week. “Just don’t tell my wife.”

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